I hope I don’t make too many enemies in today’s post (other than those champions of the adoption industry), but here goes.
I’ve desperately been trying to find some kind of compassion for the Capobianco’s. It’s difficult because of the many supposed “mistakes” that were made, and ignored, by the couple in their attempt to adopt. They seemed to have followed legal advice given to give them the best chances at “winning”, and it’s apparent they did not stop to think about the consequences for the child. It was ALL about them.
The next mark seems to be when the baby was 4 months old. Once the father objected to the adoption, the baby should have been given back to the mother or the father and his family (since he was being deployed) and NOT allowed to stay with the C’s for 2 years. I believe if one of these things would have occurred, we may not be reading about this huge mess, and this child’s entire life would not be displayed for everyone to see and judge. It would have been about what adoption is supposed to be about, a child needing a home (which this child never needed). However, a lot of us know that is the last thing adoption is about. It’s about big business adoption agencies and greedy lawyers first. Then it’s about an adoptive couple needing a baby. Then it’s the woman facing the unplanned pregnancy. Finally, it’s about the child. That has never been made more clear than in this case.
We have lawyers and adoption agencies trying to make money off one of the most lucrative businesses today. Easy money, I suspect. And one of the best things about it? Any so called “mistakes” are never brought to light (unless it’s via a complaint the top level stakeholders make against each other). Has anyone seen or heard of any investigations of Nightlight Adoption Agency and Raymond Godwin? I haven’t heard a peep. What about the guadian ad litem whose questionable tactics were brought to light in this article? I won’t hold my breath that we will see any action against these individuals. Since money wasn’t stolen like in this Arkansas Case, it doesn’t seem to be important to the powers that be.
How the adoption industry hates when these types of events make big news at all, but how they love to see the issues deflected from their unethical and, possibly, illegal practices. How they love that this took attention away from the Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Atlanta this year. How they love that we focus on the issues being about the adults and not about what really matters, the child. And that’s my argument come full circle. If adoption was reformed to be in a child’s best interest, none of this would have happened. We wouldn’t be down in the dirt slinging mud at each other. Let’s start slinging it in the right direction.